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| **TO JUDGE IS TO BE JUDGED** |
| 04.26.08 (1:02 pm) [edit] |
Good Morning All:
This morning I went through
my usual wake up routine of
drowning myself in a gallon
of Decaf in order to just wake up. With my mind still
in deep freeze from a restless night's sleep, I quickly realized that it would have been my fathers' 99th birthday had he still been alive. You know I don't know why it is
but everytime this date rolls around I become very edgy and my nerves are frayed at the thought of my father.****
Being raised partially by
him and many other pseudo-
father figures I really did not know the man as well as I thought I did. I am quite hesitant to curse
him for being my biological father because I have ben raised not to speak ill of the "dead". It is not even so much what a lousy parent he was that truly bothers me but more so the fact that this man was married twice and in both instances walked away from both families and never returned. Both marriages consisted of 4 children each and the timing of his departure in both were no doubt planned.
In both cases the oldest child in each family was no more than 15 years of age while most of the other were less than 10 years of age. My opinion is no doubt somewhat bias but the facts certainly are not.****
Now that I find myself still awaiting contact from my son after 32 years
(his mother contacted me about 2 weeks ago for the first time) I have been riddled with waves of guilt about my son and us losing contact for so long.I don't believe this is a case of "like father like son" and the circumstances are entirely different, yet why do I feel the way that I do. Perhaps I should not be so harsh in judgement of my father because really who am I to judge anyone! Have a great day everyone and thanks for listening!
Timm17
|
posted by: LadyG (reply)
post date: 04.26.08 (8:32 pm)
I am just happy that you wil be making contact with him after all these years.
posted by: auntconi (reply)
post date: 04.27.08 (6:39 am)
Good point!
I hope all goes well when you two meet again.
posted by: inkspector (reply)
post date: 05.01.08 (7:30 pm)
You should try doing some simple stretches after you wake up and get out of bed. They can make a huge difference in your day. Do the same before you go to bed.